Bear is a cat I’ve decided. She has to be to keep on being this lucky.

We were all scattered to the four corners of the house, all happily employed in various saturday-type jobs and activities, when there is a girlie yelp and a scary sounding grinding crash. Followed by the sound of glass… falling, breaking, smashing, crashing… on and on and on…

I crashed into C at the top of the stairs, him still with a piece of bed in his hand, me falling over the armload of washing I had just flung on the floor, and we bounced down the stairs in about 3 strides.

We skid to a halt in the door of the playroom; Bear (in my mere 5 minute absence) has taken it upon herself to climb up the dresser in the playroom. The dresser which has a top shelf where we keep all our glasses.

She has grabbed the shelf to balance, the shelf has tipped (it not being made to support a scrambling 2 year old) and both Bear and the entire shelf of glasses has come sliding down.

We find Bear whimpering on the floor – which is literally carpeted in shards and chunks and splinters of glass. I am in barefeet, but without thinking leap over and grab her up, holding her out to see any spreading scarlet stains… all we can see are a few cuts on her face. She is by now screaming in terror, and I have no idea if she’s broken a limb in the fall, has a hunk of glass hidden in her middle, or simply frightened.

I hold her, C examines her, Jolly and Boy look on, terrified and dumbstruck, from the relative safety of the lounge carpet.

Thankfully, she seems okay. I go sit on the lounge sofa with her to calm her while C begins the task of clearing up 19 shattered glasses (we saved 3). As I watch him I realise that surrounding where she landed there are 3 bottom-halves of glasses all with jagged tops facing up towards the ceiling, and piles of scary sharp shards covering the entire room.

Took us a full half an hour to clear the floor/dresser/sofa/toys/highchair, swept and hoovered twice – and I’m sure we’ll still find splinters for awhile.

Man. I am trading her in for a boy on Monday.

If she doesn’t kill herself, she will most certainly finish us off…